I, Wisdom, was formed long ages ago, at the very beginning, when the world came to be…before he made the world or its fields or any of the dust of the earth. I was there when he set the heavens in place, when he marked out the horizon on the face of the deep, when he established the clouds above and fixed securely the fountains of the deep, when he gave the sea its boundary so the waters would not overstep his command, and when he marked out the foundations of the earth. -Proverbs 23-29
So, I have a new daughter. Her name is Sophia. Quite frankly, she’s far more beautiful than any of your daughters, so… just wanted to give you the heads up. I’d post a few pictures, but then you’d be so blinded by jealously that you may just unsubscribe from the blog. (Oh, by the way… make sure to subscribe to the blog!)
I almost don’t know where to start when it comes to Sophia’s story. Honestly, she emerged from a series of very unexpected events. The details of those events are saved for my close friends, but the gist of the story is I will be co-parenting with someone who I am no longer in a relationship with. I also have three children from my former marriage, so the grand total is (wait for it)… you guessed it! A lot of kids! But it’s not quite worthy of a reality show, so I think I’ll live.
I’m writing this blog post from the Ronald McDonald House here in Springfield, MO (the city where Sophie’s mom is presently living). I’m here because Sophia had a life-threatening infection that was caught in time for treatment but requires over a week of antibiotics and general monitoring. I’m excited to say that she is getting stronger everyday and I can’t wait to take her home.
I always loved the name Sophia, because I’m a theology nerd. Sophia is Greek for wisdom. Not only that, but (depending on the particular tradition) it can be referring to a goddess, the wisdom of God, a central theme in Platonic thought, and the 2nd person of the Holy Trinity (i.e. Jesus). Some have gone to far as to call her the feminine aspect of God. No matter how you slice it, there can be no mistake…
…her name kicks ass.
But better yet, she is already teaching me her wisdom. She reminds me that yes, there is pain and regret, things we can’t change or do over… but that there are new beginnings, more powerful than any darkness that preceded her. The last year has been excruciating for me personally, and for many others. I honestly had no plans to have more children. But, here she is. She makes me want to fight again, to find strength again. She reminds me that when we are most vulnerable, love can still find us and show us a new way. She is brand new, seeing the world through her blurry eyes for the first time, and she is already infinitely loved. What does that say about us? Why do we feel so alone?
I don’t know if there’s a God. Maybe the cosmos in all its endless splendor linked us together from the beginning. Maybe a truth so grand we ought call it divine was at the helm, steering her to me. Maybe it was fate wrapped up in serendipity, chasing providence through destiny’s door. Maybe she was as the proverbs declare, before the heavens were set in place. Who knows?
Yet she is here… teaching me her wisdom.
(jealousy in 3…2…1…)